• When dining with another couple, it’s probably best to not scoff at the price of a reasonably priced $40 bottle of wine and refuse to split that portion of the check. I guess there’s a reason he’s my ex-husband.
• I respect the fact that you’re a vegetarian, but please don’t pretend to become physically ill when my nonvegetarian entree arrives and proceed to tell me how “meat is murder” for the duration of our date. I suppose there’s a reason you’re my ex-boyfriend. For the record, the chicken was delicious.
• Sometimes restaurants get busy and servers get overwhelmed. It happens. But if my glass of wine is still full and I’m not leaving right away, waiting for the server to run my card is a nonissue. When on a date, however, it’s probably not best to flag the server down by brandishing the check and demanding that your card be run because things are taking “entirely too long.” There is a reason we only went out once.