More response to "Bring Disappointment Back" 


More response to "Bring Disappointment Back"

I would like to respond to the commentary written by Mariane Matera (Back Page, Jan. 4). This commentary title lauds disappointment as something positive. I think differently.

First, the correct spelling of someone's name does matter. Maybe to her it doesn't. However, to a child and even to me as an adult, it matters. If someone pronounces your name incorrectly, wouldn't you correct them? Well, if a name is spelled wrong, shouldn't it be brought to the attention of the guilty party?

Secondly, her rationale of a teacher having her husband threaten to pull his ads so that her class would get more coverage does not explain why children are taking guns to school and killing people. This rationale is irrational and invalid. Better rationale would be that the parents of children who bring guns to school have not been paying attention to the activities of their children or they own guns themselves and do not bother to properly secure them.

Thirdly, the news report she saw concerning a parent who was not pleased with Toys R Us for only sending one Game Boy cartridge and a $100 gift certificate instead of the two Game Boy cartridges he ordered is more of an indication of businesses not being properly stocked to handle the ever increasing online buying population. This parent wanted to please their child. A $100 gift certificate is a nice gesture but not what the parent thought the child wanted. The bottom line is that Toys R Us was not able to deliver what it should have been able to. If I order something from a store, I expect the item I order and not a consolation gift.

Disappointment is a part of life. There is no need for her to complain about parents, teachers, or others who only want to see children happy and get what they feel they deserve.

Of course, children will learn about disappointment. However, there is nothing wrong with doing the best you can as a parent to recognize your child's accomplishments and reward them. Children should not get everything they want. However, a parent or teacher should not feel guilty for doing their best to ensure their child is recognized for their achievements and rewarded occasionally.

Brian Ezell

You'll probably get a lot of negative response on your Back Page, so I wanted to give you some positive feedback.

I agree. Parents these days do shelter their kids from disappointment. And I think a lot of it is due to guilt. It's a different world than the one I grew up in. In the 1960s, my mom stayed home and raised five children — one wheelchair bound.

We survived on my dad's earnings as a painter. We all learned to live with what we had — there was no choice.

Today my wife is in the vast minority by staying home with our three little girls. We don't have a new SUV (and wouldn't want one). And yesterday I was listening to "All Things Considered" on National Public Radio and I heard a working mom complain that she was exhausted by 1 p.m. while still at work. She and her husband also complained that they had to spend $17,000 annually on a nanny. They were looking to the government (of all places) for help. Please.

Life is full of choices and options. It's a shame no one can make the connection that the frantic pursuit for status and money has a price. It is billed to our children and our environment.

Thanks for telling it like it is.

Vince Newton


In the Jan. 18/ Street Talk, Style Weekly incorrectly identified Det. Bob Crane with the Richmond Police Dept. Style regrets the error.

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