Tim Timberlake 

Tim Timberlake for his omnipresence.

A psychologically disturbed, stalker-victimlike kiss to Tim Timberlake, the former morning man at WRVA 1140-AM, whose soft-timbered, warm and friendly voice has become my living nightmare. I can't get him out of my head!

Case No. 1: Pumping gas, Rennie's, West Broad Street. Biting cold wind. Jacket pulled close. No one around, and it is quiet except for a few cars passing by. Suddenly, from behind my left shoulder: "Brrrrr, it's cold outside." I know that voice. It's Timberlake. I turn my head. He is not there. Only a gas pump with a hidden speaker. "Wouldn't a hot cup of coffee taste great right about now? Just come on inside." I get back in my car.

Case No. 2: The car radio. Every time I am in the car, listening to the radio. Song ends. Cue commercial: "This is Tim Timberlake … with Bon Secours (pronounced Suh-CORE) Medical Matters …."

Case No. 3: I need to check on something that requires me to call Lewis Ginter Botanical Garden. I look up the number. I dial the number. Rings. A chill runs up my spine. He is there. "Thanks for calling … There's something always growing and changing here at the garden, and we look forward to seeing you very soon. … If this is an emergency, please call security …. "

I'm calling, Tim. Oh yes, I'm calling.

more smooches

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