+8 Richmond wins the right to serve as host for the World Road Cycling Championships in 2015. For one brief, spectacular moment, the Capital of the Confederacy becomes the Shining City of Spandex.
+3 The Chesterfield County Board of Supervisors gives the go-ahead on a deal that would allow Cloverleaf Mall to be demolished, making way for the biggest Kroger in Virginia. How big will it be? Shopping-cart mileage will be tax-deductible.
+4 The Virginia Museum of Fine Arts draws a sellout crowd to its first burlesque show, a titillating performance by the Richmond Institute of Burlesque, inspired by the “Fabergé Revealed” exhibit. But even Picasso showed more skin.
+5 The gay community and its friends and supporters turn out to the Kanawha Plaza for entertainment, food and networking during Virginia Pride’s PrideFest 2011. At the end of this rainbow was a leprechaun. A really fabulous leprechaun.
+2 VCU basketball coach Shaka Smart and his wife, Maya Payne Smart, celebrate the birth of their first child, a daughter. She’s already started dribbling like a star.
-2 Richmond goes a week with no President Obama or Sir Richard Branson visits, no NASCAR races, hurricanes, or downtown music festivals. This place was so quiet the people on Twitter had to go back to talking about themselves.
-4 Hurricane Irene may be long gone, but some frustrated residents are still operating without phone, cable and Internet service. On the upside, all those Lincoln movie extras are getting ahead on their method acting.
+3 The city is host to some 1,000 SWAT team members, in town for the National Tactical Operations Conference. So if you see a guy with a Hello name tag on his riot shield, that’s why.
+1 Gov. Bob McDonnell gets preliminary approval from the feds to add tolls to Interstate 95 near the North Carolina line. Fine with us, as long as we get a refund every time we have to drive through Woodbridge.
-5 On their home turf, despite a valiant effort, the Richmond Flying Squirrels lose the Eastern League Championship to the New Hampshire Fisher Cats. Nuts.
+7 President Obama packs ’em in at the University of Richmond, delivering a speech on the flailing economy to a crowded Robins Center. Long story short, it turns out he has the only job in America that’s guaranteed for four years.
+5 Billionaire and space-traveling entrepreneur Sir Richard Branson swoops into town to headline a business conference, a glitzy fundraising gala and a private brunch with children. And on the seventh day, he made Dirtwoman clean.
+6 The first RVA Music Fest hypes up bands across town, finishing the two-day event with a big street festival in Shockoe Bottom. We’d tell you how many hipsters were in attendance, but it’s a really obscure number. You probably never heard of it.
+3 NASCAR driver Kevin Harvick parties with fans at the Hat Factory, handing out Budweisers as a guest bartender before going on to win the Wonderful Pistachios 400 at Richmond International Raceway. Beer, nuts and getting ahead in laps: It’s like every bachelor party we’ve ever been to.
+8 And when all was said and done, Richmond marked the 10th anniversary of 9/11 with commemorations, discussions and pledges of service. And there was little else that could have brought perspective to the city’s biggest weekend of the year.
Special Shecky Greene Post-Irene Edition
-2 How many Richmonders does it take to change a light bulb? Five. One to change it, four to hold the flashlights.
-1 What’s on second. Who’s on first? The guy down the street with the generator.
-1 I saw a lineman who was still using a Bronco bucket truck. How old was it? It was so old Moses used it to restore the Red Sea.
-2 Your mom’s a bucket truck.
+4 But seriously, folks. This isn’t the first Irene we needed cold showers for.
+7 Power’s back on and your refrigerator’s running. You’d better go catch it.
-5 Knock knock. Who’s there? Dominion. Dominion who? Dominion you get da electricity, you realize your cable’s still out.